Taking Your Time

Dear Daughter,

This Wednesday you and Papa went to Middelheim, the outdoor sculpture "museum" with all kinds of sculptures spread throughout the park.

We went there to have a picnic lunch and it was a beautiful day. The leaves looked like they were almost on fire and the sky was super blue.

After eating lunch we walked around with Papa's camera and you took a few pictures of your own. I was so impressed with how you took your Time to really frame each picture and did such a great job.

It's important to take you time and to do something right, rather than just rush through it and miss the moment. Thank you for helping me share that slowing down of Time as you took these pictures, being so careful to "get it right."

Not too shabby for a six-year old...

I Love You,
Papa

Connections Across the Ocean

Dear Daughter,

Your Mama told me that you went to Paris and to the Efteling this week with her for your fall break. I am so happy for you.

Paris is such a special place and I know that you got to learn all about the Eiffel Tower and got to see it from your hotel!

Papa is in the US now, but will soon be home. However, something that you want to see here is the Statue of Liberty in New York City. And, guess what? It was a gift from France to declare the possibility of being in a new country with new-found freedoms and opportunities.

So, we will go to the Statue of Liberty someday and then you can then think about how across the Ocean there stands the Eiffel Tower as a symbol of ingenuity and co-operation as well.

I am so happy that you got to go to the Efteling with your friends, it is a very special place and Papa will take you there again when I am back in Belgium.

Papa loves you so much.

I Love You,

Papa

When Things Change, or Not

Dear Daughter,

Well, Papa has nearly finished the move from the old "English House" to the new one.

There have been many changes, yet some things have stayed the same.

Life will always present us with challenges and changes. Sometimes changes can be dramatic, other times subtle.

But, what we can learn each time is that with a change, there comes awareness. You are so aware of the changes, and Papa is just trying to do his best and to let you know of the changes as they come.

As with Kwan-Yin, who came with us and was previously in the garden, she now "sits" in our living room.

Such change is good.

I Love You,
Papa

Sympathy

Dear Daughter,

It has been a while since Papa has written for your blog, but we have spent much time together and you make Papa very proud and happy each day.

Papa received some difficult news lately about an old friend and student and has talked with several people who also knew this person who died recently.

There is something that one day you will unfortunately also have to experience, which is sympathy for others whom have lost someone they love. It is difficult, but it also provides a connection with people. From Death, new Life inevitably comes.

There is a strange connection between the two, perhaps inseparable.

You are a very compassionate, empathetic, and sympathetic person already, so I know that this will all make sense to you one day as well.

I Love You,

Papa

Change is Not Always Easy

Dear Daughter,

You have now been in your new school for a few weeks.

Changing schools is difficult, and Papa knows that very well. When he was your age he changed schools too, and it was not always easy.

However, what came of that was a big, new way of looking at things.

I met a good friend named Phillip and he had a pet Raccoon, and we painted our faces one night like the members of KISS…that is another story. I also learned how to think about things differently as you are in your new school too.

Change is not always easy, my child, but you have done amazingly well with your Change.

I Love You,

Papa

You Know When You're in Texas When...

Dear Daughter,

Papa will soon be back in Belgium again and see you soon. I can't wait to hear about your travels to Italy and France with your Belgian friends and family.

Papa was driving the other day again across Texas and had to stop at a roadside rest stop.

Here is a picture of the playground. Make sure you read the sign!!

I did not see any children playing on there this time, I wonder why?

I Love You,

Papa

Looking Glass

Dear Daughter,

There is a saying in life about a glass of water and how people will view it differently. If the glass contains one half of its potential amount, it is said that there are two ways to look at it.

Some, those whom people call "pessimists" will say that the glass is half empty, because they focus on what they don't have, not what they do.

Others, those called "optimists" will say that the glass is half full, because they focus on the fact that although you may not have everything, you still have some left. Or, that something is better than nothing.

However, I like to look at it a third way, as Papa often does, and to look at the pretty glass and be grateful that I have one at all.

Remember, there are many ways to look at things in the world, we can choose how we will do so, and that can change everything.

I Love You,
Papa

We Are Still Not Alone

Dear Daughter,

Remember how last year you saw the three bear cubs with their mother at our cabin? This year we saw the little cubs, now yearlings, each one at at time since the mama bear had sent them all out into the wild. She was still around as well, but we did not see her, though Grandma and Dale did one morning.

Here is one of the little ones who managed to get into a bird feeder that had been there undisturbed by bears for ten years. His little brother, the runt of the three, later came and pulled it down for good, so the birdies are going to have to find another way to eat their seeds from now on!

We saw all kinds of animals again this year, and even a spotted Bambi!

I am glad that you got to see so much nature again this year.

I Love You,
Papa

When The Target is Not the Goal

Dear Daughter,

When we were up in the mountains at the cabin, we shot arrows with your new bow. Remember last year when we were here and you were too small to shoot arrows and you learned how to be a patient quiver instead?

This year you are big enough and strong enough to pull the bow by yourself.

You began to get frustrated though because the arrows were not going as far as Papa's. However, I told you that the goal was not to hit the target, but to keep practicing and learn how to shoot. One day you will be hitting the target if you practice patiently.

Each time, your arrow went a bit further and you began to be able to load the arrow and steady yourself on your own. That, indeed was the Goal.

I Love You,
Papa

When Plans Fail

Dear Daughter,

Yesterday we drove from Amarillo to Santa Fe, New Mexico.

Papa had planned for us to go swimming first, so that perhaps you might sleep a bit in the car.

However, all three pools we went to did not open til later, so we decided to get on the road.

Papa had remembered that there was an outdoor "lake-pool" in Santa Rosa that we stopped at once when you were just a little baby.

After visiting the Dinosaur Museum in Tucumcari, we drove on to Santa Rosa and found the "lake-pool" open and got to swim for a couple of hours, ride a glittery paddle-boat, and see lots of beautiful lapis lazuli-colored damselflies.

What an unexpected surprise.

Always remember that when your original plans fail, that could be an opportunity for something even better.

I Love You,
Papa

PS you slept the last part of the trip, thankfully during the crazy Santa Fe afternoon traffic coming in and while Papa unloaded the car ;-)

Viewing Time and Space Through the Looking Glass

Dear Daughter,

Papa came back from his short trip to London and brought you some booty from across the Channel. We checked them out last evening and already put them to use.

I had forgotten that I did not have stuff for your lunch for school, so we had to walk over to the store to get things, so, we got to use your new Compass to help figure out which direction we were going.

And, you were able to use your new Magnifying Glass to read the letters indicating that we were going SE or SouthEast.

And, then, after making a card for your friend and looking at the other things Papa brought back from London, I told you that it was Time to go to bed, and showed you on your Pocket Watch, (since you can never keep your hands of Papa's fancy pocket watch) so you can now begin to tell Time as well, which you also looked at with your Magnifying Glass.

I hope you enjoy learning all about Time and Space with these things and as you already do, to look closer at the world around you.

I Love You,
Papa

Like a Pale Balloon

Dear Daughter,

While Papa was in London, Summer officially began with the longest day of the year. Maybe you noticed that it is much lighter later, especially in Belgium where it is very far North. Papa bought you a compass while here, so we can always tell which way is North when we are traveling.

Last night, when Papa was walking, he saw this beautiful moon over the streets of London. Remember how you always used to get excited about the "day-time moon which hangs like a pale balloon"? This moon reminded me of you always saying that when we would be riding on the bicycle to school.

Papa will be back in Antwerp tonight and then you and I will be going to Texas soon, where the nights will be very hot, and the moon very big. Remember last year when we saw the giant Blue Moon?

I hope you enjoy this picture. It looks like the poster of a Magritte painting that Papa has in his bedroom, don't you think?

I Love You,
Papa

Do They Speak English There?

Dear Daughter,

Papa is in London for a couple of days, which is a really big city in England, just across the English Channel from Belgium.

Here they have a Queen and they just celebrated something called a "jubilee" to celebrate how long she has been the Queen of England, so there are lots of British flags everywhere and pictures of the Queen.

The language that you speak with Papa is called English because it came from here, but it is a bit different than the English that you speak with Papa, because it is from America. So, when you visit England, you will hear people say words like "posh" and "lovely" a lot. They also say different words for the same things we have. The back of a car, which we call a trunk is a "boot" here and an elevator is what they use in Belgium too, a "lift". Big trucks are called "lorries" and when you are in a store or restaurant, they will ask, "Are you all right?" instead of "Can I help you?"

So, just like the differences in languages, you will find that there are also differences in the same language.

Crazy, isn't it?

I Love You,
Papa

PS I found something cool for you at the Portobello market this morning.

A Flower Given to My Daughter

Dear Daughter,

Papa is reminded of James Joyce this weekend because it was Bloomsday, something Papa will explain later when you are older.

James Joyce was an Irish writer who loved languages and inventing new words and puzzles with words. He lived in Belgium for a short while and called Antwerp "Gnatwerp" because of all the muggen, something you also don't like here because they bite you at night.

He also had a daughter, Lucia, whom he loved very much and wrote her this poem that I wanted to share with you.

It is called, "A Flower Given to My Daughter." I have tried to provide you with flowers of various kinds over the years, and you gave me the most beautiful one the other day from the vine outside.

Here is the poem.


Frail the white rose and frail are
Her hands that gave
Whose soul is sere and paler
Than time's wan wave.

Rosefrail and fair -- yet frailest
A wonder wild
In gentle eyes thou veilest,
My blueveined child. 


Always keep your wonder wild and eyes gentle to the Beauty of life.

I Love You,
Papa

One Fish, Edue Gheti

Dear Daughter,

We have been reading lots of Dr. Seuss lately as you are in the early stages of reading and now see all the funny words that Papa used to read to you are now ones that you need to puzzle through.

And, English is not easy.

With Dutch, which we also read at times, there is a one-to-one equivalent of what a word looks like and how it sounds.

Unfortunately, and fortunately, my Daughter, you are bi-lingual with English and it is not always easy. We have puzzled through many words together and at times, you just look at me with exasperation and say, "Papa, how can this sound like this?!?"

I am sorry, there is no good rule for English, and it will just come down to practice.

One of the books we read was "One Fish, Two Fish...", but the second part could be written Edue Gheti.

If you take the -ed of a word like trick-ed, it sounds like "t", then add the "ue" from Tuesday and you get Edue. And then, the "gh" of enough added to the "e" of pen and the "ti" of the suffix "tion" you get Gheti, which could sound like Two Fish.

I know, my child, things are complicated, but luckily you have the sense of humor to see that sometimes things are just silly.

I Love You,
Papa

Left Out

Dear Daughter,

Thank you for the Father's Day greetings today. For some reason, in all of Belgium, it is Father's Day today, but not in Antwerp, leaving it out of the calendar for this day.

However, you said that you were "glad that I am your Papa," to which I responded that "I am glad that I have you as a daughter, because, otherwise, I wouldn't be a Papa."

The worlds of children and parents are intertwined and entangled, sometimes things are for the better, sometimes things can be rather for the worse, but we remain parents and children all of our lives, no matter what the circumstances.

Yesterday, when you saw a flower blooming on our vine in the courtyard, you whispered, "I wish I could just cut one off for Papa." I "heard" you, but asked what did you say. You answered, "Nothing, Papa, but you can't look at me for a little bit." In the interim, I held my hands over my eyes and heard lots of shuffling and you talking to yourself, guiding yourself through the process.

Then, you asked me to look, and taking away my hands from my eyes, here is what I saw:

This was the best Father's Day gift I could ever ask for, even if it wasn't for Father's Day.

I Love You,
Papa

The Game of LIFE

Dear Daughter,

Last evening after dinner, we played the game of LIFE on my iPad, a game that Papa used to play many years ago as a board game and with the funky white, plastic volcanic spinner. Perhaps we'll play the real thing too this summer in New Mexico.

You won the game, and I was thinking that it was nice that the advice I was able to give you in the game of LIFE helped you to do better than Papa, which is what we always hope for our children at some level.

Also, at one point, when it came to "Spin to Win," something you had done twice already that game, once with four numbers and then again with two to no avail, this time you only had one number. I suggested to you to put down quite a bit of a gamble because you were winning and could afford it. You said,  "I know it won't work." To that, I countered that we can never know for 100% certain that something will or will not work. You allowed me to gamble the maximum for your spin, and guess what, you hit the number this time and that won the game for you.

We can NEVER know for sure if something will or will not happen. Sometimes it is foolish to take big risks, but at other times, those risks are what "win" the game of LIFE for us.

Thank you for trying, and thank you for realizing that even if something went wrong in the past, it does not mean that it will in the present.

I Love You,

Papa

Papa's Papa's Old Records

Dear Daughter,

As we were playing UNO tonight, and a certain Papa was getting schooled by his six-year old daughter game after game, we were also listening to my father's old LPs that I have here.

Recently I was able to hook up this new record player to play via the computer, and we have been listening to many ever since.

During the game a few times, Papa had to get up and persuade the needle forward as it got stuck in a groove.

Sometimes, we also can get stuck in a groove and we just need a bit of persuasion with a helping hand to move us forward.

Well, at least I got to listen to some of my favorite old Albums tonight, not so much luck with UNO...

I Love You,
Papa

Everything Has a Place, and a Time

Dear Daughter,

Papa has been rather busy with work and he let things get a bit messy lately, but this week we cleaned up everything together.

Now, it is easier to see that everything does have a place to go, your shoes and clothes and Papa's myriads of books, records and CDs. Before, it just looked like one big, Chaotic mess, but now, we can see the method to the various things around the English House.

Sometimes it is important to do a thorough cleaning and find out what belongs and what doesn't. When the remainder is found, we can find a place for each thing.

And, there is a Time for cleaning and a Time for things getting a little messy. The trick is to figure out the difference and when to respond to that Time, so that everything finds its Place.

I Love You,
Papa

PS Like Papa, every now and then it is okay to throw your clothes on the floor. Sometimes it is okay to just be a bit messy.

Look Closer

Dear Daughter,

Here is a picture of a flower that Papa bought recently that you will see when you are back in Antwerp. Look closely in the middle and you will see that there is a second flower starting to emerge from the center of this one!

If we look closer at the things around us, we will always be surprised to see what we might find. I hope that you will never cease to be amazed at the details of Beauty that surround us, even in the smallest things.

I Love You,

Papa

Taggin' The Caddies

Dear Daughter,

Yesterday, on our way out, we went to Cadillac Ranch outside of Amarillo. It is a large public art project from the Ant Farm art group, supported by Stanley Marsh, a local eccentric who has many such projects in and around Amarillo.

We took our spray paints cans and added to the art project, wasn't that fun!

It helps us learn that art can be a living project and that it always better to share the experience.

And, Papa had fun Taggin' the Caddies with you!

I Love You,

Papa

Planes, Planes, Planes

Dear Daughter,

Tonight we are in the Brussels-Zaventem airport hotel, getting ready for our big trip tomorrow to America.

This Time, we will have three planes again, but not in the same order as last Time when we had a Big Plane, a Middle-sized Plane and a Little, Bitty Plane. But, just like last Time, if we take it one plane at a Time, then we can manage the trip better.

Tomorrow we will go on a Medium-sized Plane to London, then a Big Plane to Dallas, and then a Little, Bitty Plane to Amarillo.

So, although we are going to the same place, we'll just go a slightly different way.

I Love You,

Papa

His Name Was Bob

Dear Daughter,

The other day, on the back of the bike, as we were riding to school, for some reason, you said,

“Papa, I’m glad you’re still my Papa. I’m sorry you don’t have a Papa any more. He’s dead. That’s the way Life goes, you’re alive and then you go Dead. His name was Bob.”

Well, not the thing that one expects at 8 am, though it is vintage you, my Daughter. His name was Bob, and one day I will tell you more about him, some good things, some not so good things, just like about your own Papa.

Papas are not perfect and we, like anyone else, are capable of doing things that we are not proud of, but that, my dear Daughter, is for another day.

Thank you for being happy that I am your Papa, faults and all.

I Love You,

Papa

I Feel Funny

Dear Daughter,

The other day, when you were practicing reading, you had on a shirt from Canadian, Texas, where much of our family has lived over the years.

On the shirt, it says, "You Are Here!" and points to an "X" in the panhandle of Texas on a cartoon map where Canadian is.

We read it, and you said, "But, I'm not there, I'm here!"at which we both laughed at because you were being silly.

We can, however, only be in one place at one time, though. Sometimes people try to be in many places all at once in their minds, but the only place you can truly be is, in fact "right here, right now."

Thanks for making Papa laugh though. You are funny.

I Love You,

Papa

Red, Green, or Christmas?

Dear Daughter,

Last evening we were playing UNO together again. Now, although you are not supposed to tell the other players which cards you have, what you did say was pretty funny. And, you wanted me to tell "everyone" who knows about New Mexico what you said.

At one point you said, "Papa, I have all greens and reds, just like Christmas Chiles!"

You laughed very hard at your observation, and I told you that I had had Christmas Chile too in New Mexico last week. When we go in a few weeks, you can order the Christmas sauce for me as well.

I Love You,

Papa

Duck!

Dear Daughter,

Papa is back in Belgium again after being in New Mexico and Texas for a while, so I am happy to be spending time with you again.

We looked through some of the pictures today and you recognized this little fellow right away from the Taos toy store that you played at with Ford last summer. We will go there soon again for your Spring Break, but it was fun to see your reaction to him.

Remember how Papa told you about the Blue Roofs in India when he flew into Mumbai? Well, in New Mexico, it is an old tradition to paint the doorways this beautiful blue color for appeasing the Spirits. Papa tried to find its origin and some people say that it even came from India originally through the Spanish! But, Papa is not sure and will continue to look into this. For now, do you think that the little Duck is related to Ganesha, the Elephant-boy who guards the doorways in India?

I Love You,

Papa

Making Space

Dear Daughter,

Big day for you!

Your first loose tooth. Well, soon the baby teeth will begin to come out and you will start to get new ones growing in.

You said that you did not like it that you will loose the teeth, but I told you that in order to get your big girl teeth you need to loose the baby teeth. Because, remember that you cannot have two teeth in the same Space at the same Time.

To that you shrugged your shoulders and sighed, "yes, Papa, I guess you're right..."

So, time to begin making room for new things by getting rid of the old.

I Love You,

Papa

Eternity in An Hour

Dear Daughter,

Yesterday we looked through Papa's book that he made for you on the iPad, since we are waiting for the hard copy to come.

I cannot tell you the Joy that those moments brought to me.

When you saw the picture of the bubbles in your hands, you lit up the whole room with your smile. Papa had told you that I was going to do something special with that picture, and now you got to see it.

And, when we got to the end, and you saw the drawing that we had made of the Yin and Yang, you said, "Heart and Brain are Like Yin and Yang!"

Words failed me.

I Love You,

Papa

Heart and Brain

Dear Daughter,

Last evening, while getting ready for bed, you asked me, "Papa, what is the most specialist part of our bodies? The Heart or the Brain?"

I told you that they were both equally important, that without the Brain, the Heart would not know how to beat, and without the Heart, the Brain would die.

I then told you about the Chinese concept of Yin and Yang and I drew the figure for you as part of our Buglette Chronicle. We talked about how in the circle there is Light and there is Dark, but they are not opposites, but they are connected. For, within the Light, there is  always a piece of the Dark and the other way around. And, only in the presence of the Dark, can you see just how brilliant the Light is, for otherwise, everything were merely be dull. And, it is necessary to have both the Light and the Dark in order to have a Perfect Circle, complete with its Imperfections.

You said, "Ah, yes, that is what the Peacock in Kung Fu Panda says, 'something Light and something Dark will come."

Exactly.

So, without our mind, we cannot Love with our hearts, but, without our hearts, our brains would never know what Love is.

Remember, Heart and Brain are like Yin and Yang.

I Love You,

Papa

A Game of Chess

Dear Daughter,

Happy New Year!

With each New Year, and each new day, life will bring us challenges that may seem too big to overcome at times.

However, when we take such challenges one move at a time, as in a game of chess, we can deal with them.  Sometimes, in Life, there is no winner, nor loser though. You will hear a lot of talk about winning and losing as you grow up, but always remember, that the most important thing is whether or not you participate and how you react to games that you win, or ones that you lose.

In chess, there is also a Stalemate, in which the game can go no further, and each side must concede. Knowing when to concede or when to keep playing will serve you far better than how many times you win.

Life is not a game of Chess, though. Life is much, much richer and complex in its beauty and challenges than a single game could ever be.

I Love You,

Papa